Oh If It Were True

As I was dreaming, I dreamt about baby gator-talking.

Let me paint the picture. There are a few details that helped me realize that this was only a dream that I will also share with you, so you too can know it was only a dream. Not that I needed them, but I am still a recovering sleep deprived mom.....who am I kidding I am totally still sleep deprived and this is why I have dreams like this.

I was in my hometown in the country, and I had just gotten out of the shower. Baby gator saw the tv (no tv in my room or bathroom) and as he gazed at the tv commercial for Mountain Dew he asked me if we had any Mountain Dew. 

I explained that we did not have any, after peering at the vending machine in a locker room. Oh ya we were now in my junior high girls locker room.

As I realized my feet were terribly still dirty (if you know me at all, you know this is a big deal) so i walk to get back in the shower. I then asked where he learned to talk. He said he learned how to talk from dogs, but "they" don't talk because it freaks humans out. 

You know, after all he is a baby, and babies are sometimes weird, and can totally be considered abnormal and not human. So I sidestep the fact that he doesn't include himself in the human population and ask who is included in the "they" he is referring to.

He replied bluntly, dogs and babies. 

I asked when was he able to talk to dogs and he explained that he learned when he was at the vet adoption agency. Apparently dogs are very talkative and like Mountain Dew and they talk all the time to other dogs and babies when humans aren't around. 

I then get upset in the dream because he was never at a vet adoption agency, only a hospital. 

And this is how I knew it was only a dream and my baby did not learn how to talk from dogs. 

Oh did I mention he sounded like Chris Tucker? Also upsetting. What happened to the cute baby voice?